Wednesday, March 27

Deb stopped by pop's today, and took him a root beer shake.   He was very happy - kept drinking and drinking and saying how good it was.   See pic below.

Ann is down and she was able to spend some time with him.  Said they had a guy there that was singing and clapping, and pop was going right along with him.   He was having fun.

Pop's glasses are lost again.  AND, Eric was visiting last night and dad did wander into rooms where the doors were open. Sally is aware they are missing, and they aren't in Stan's room.  It's entirely possible dad took them off somewhere, even in someone else's room, and set them down.   I did talk to Sally, and she said the residents that use chums or something to keep their glasses around their heads, seem to do ok with them.  So, if the glasses turn up, we can try this. 

Sunday, March 24th

Mom went to see dad on Friday, and he was sitting on one of the couches in the big room, talking to the ladies.  He had his glasses on - guess they found them.   Dad was happy to see her, and asked her where she'd been.  She told him he had been sleeping all week, and that she had been there every day.   Guess he said, "Well, how about that."   As it turns out, Stan does wander and they are trying to work with him on that.
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Went up this morning, and dad was in church.   I stood at the back, and watched everyone.  There are a bunch of volunteers who come in and take the residents to church, and several of them walked up to me and asked me if I was there with someone.   The volunteer position is actually a church calling, and they are in that position for about 2-3 years.   Afterwards, I walked up to dad, and stuck my head over his shoulder and said hi.  He said, "Hi, little girl."  Wow.   A woman walked up to me and said, "And you are...".  Told her I was one of his daughters and would take him back to his area.  She said that was fine, she had been assigned to him, and wanted to make sure he made it back.  I liked the fact that they really keep an eye on them, and any visitors around.   Dad wanted to go back to his room, so we walked down the hall.  Two ladies, Grace and Elaine, decided to walk with us.  Elaine told me I needed to help save Charles, and when I asked her why, she said something about the big black things flying in.  Told her I would try and save him.  She then commented how softly Charles talks, and she can barely him. But, he is such a nice man.   As we got closer to dad's room, Skipper aka Naolia, was laying on the floor.   I asked her if she needed help, and she told me to go away, she didn't need any help.   I watched her and she was obsessed with the pattern on the carpet.  Pretty soon, she stood up and went on her merry way.   You never know what you are going to see or hear at this place.  Dad was cold, so I was helping him put on his sweater, and out of the blue he said,"Where's Travis and Jay?"   Wow.  Told him Jay is in Las Vegas, and Trav was in Chicago.  He then said, "They are good kids."   You just never know what is rolling around in that brain of his.   He sat on the couch in the sun, and he was facing the cars on his wall.   We started talking about the cars, and then he was telling me about living on the farm with his brothers and the cars they liked to drive.   I couldn't understand him half the time, but he was enjoying being able to talk and laugh.  He then started talking about "this place" and they sure have good food.  Lots of snacks too.   Told him it was time for me to take him back down the hall to lunch, and he asked what he was having.  Don't know.  He said he hopes it was dead.  Then laughed.   We were halfway down the hall, and the aide came and asked him if he wanted turkey or beef.  He said, "Yeah."   Then laughed.   Sat him down, and told him I would be back with mom in a little while.  He then said, "Shirley Mae?"   Yup, the one and only.   I started to leave and he said, "Hey, I want some of that stuff."  Couldn't figure it out, and he was having a hard time coming up with it, and was pointing at the glass.   Asked him if he wanted root beer...yes, that was it.  Told the aide on the way out that he wanted root beer, and she said he has it every day at lunch.

Headed to Shirl's and ate dinner with her, then we filled out insurance forms.  Will get those mailed off tomorrow.    We then went down to the home, and as we were walking down the hall, Stan started to follow us.   He is a big boy.    We walked into the Man Cave, and dad was sound asleep in his chair - deeply.  Didn't even flinch when I rubbed his arm.   A knock on the door - I answered it and there was Stan.   He said, "I wasn't sure where we were going."  Told him Charlie was taking a nap and we were going to stay with him.  He said OK, and walked off.   Mom dozed and after a little bit, I decided to take off.   Dad was still out - didn't even move when I kissed his head.  This is the first time in a month that I haven't cried when I've left him.  Guess that's a good thing.  He really does seem settled, likes his room, and it's good to see him socialize with everyone.   Pictures from today - sitting in the sun on the couch, and then snoozing in his chair this afternoon.

Wednesday Update

Yes, things have been pretty quiet!   No more wearing of women's clothes, and no slugging.   Dad definitely seems to be settling in, and is doing well.   This make it easier on all of us.   He is pretty wobbly today, as he was on Monday.   He hasn't had anymore falls, though.  

Weekend Update

Dad had a great time on the ride this past Friday.   Now that the weather is better, they will take scenic bus rides every Friday afternoon.   When I talked to him Saturday, he did remember that he had seen a bunch of horses and thought that was pretty neat.   They took them to a ranch up by Morgan.   This wore him out thought, he could barely keep his eyes open for dinner Friday evening, but he did have fun.

Saturday was a good day.   Spent some time with dad before our support group on Saturday afternoon. After the group, I took him for a walk around the grounds, and he clipped right along.   Liked seeing the cars in the parking lot, and he had a good time.   He did say he wanted to go for a ride, and I told him when I visited the next time, I would take him.  Sally feels like this will be fine, as long as we don't take him home.   The picture below is after we came back from his walk and he was resting.

Yesterday, Sunday, Chancellor called mom about 2:00 and dad had fallen.   She went down there and he was in his room with his arm wrapped in gauze.   She spent some time with him, then went home, but returned for dinner.    When she walked in, he was eating dinner sitting in a wheelchair.   I called James, the tech assignment to dad until 10 last night.   They think dad was either reaching for something on the table and fell out of the chair, or stood up and tripped over his feet.   He had scraped his arm on the carpet - nothing serious, but because his skin is so think, they put some neosporin on it and wrapped it.    Had a little bump on the back of his head.   They checked his vitals, eyes weren't dialated, blood pressure was fine.    James said he hadn't been on the floor very long, as they had just seen him walk back to his room.  He figures about 10 to 15 minutes, at the most.   Asked him about the wheelchair.   He said when he went to get dad for dinner, dad didn't want to walk.   He was very wobbly, but not like a head injury wobbly, like he sometimes gets.   They brought him to dinner in a wheelchair as a safely measure.  After dinner, he was up walking around with no problem.  Said the would be checking him every hour during the night, to make sure he didn't have any injuries.  Something funny - when mom first walked in, dad had someone else's pants on, and a woman's sweater around his shoulders.  When she returned, he was in his own clothes.   We are thinking that dad probably took these from a stack of clothes that is sitting on the chair outside his room.  The aides wouldn't have done this, as they all know where dad's clothes are, and laundry had just been done Friday night - there were plenty of clean clothes.  Dad probably just grabbed them from the stack.

Told mom to call me during the night if she received a call, or if she called down there and things had turned south.  No call, so I am assuming dad had a good night.

Note - Naolia and Skipper are the same.   Apparently, Naolia has never been married and in the heyday of the free love era, spent some time in a nudist colony in San Francisco.   Sally said she has been known to strip off everything, even recently.   Wanted us to be aware.  They try to keep clothes on her, but obviously aren't able to watch her every second of the day.  It all makes sense now!
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2:00 pm
Dad had a good night, no developments from his fall yesterday.  Doing well.   They couldn't get him to eat breakfast this morning, but he did eat lunch.    In a good mood, no concerns or problems.  Whew!

Friday Night 

My boy and I were in the area and stopped by around 5 last night for a visit. Grandpa had just finished dinner and was back in his room, when we entered his room I yelled for him but nothing, I walked in further and he wasn't in there....so I thought. He then shouts..come on in...I said where are you? I walk to the pitch black bathroom and there he is fumbling with his belt, I helped him do his belt up and told him MAYBE you should turn on the light and you could actually see what your doing. I know these are his normal clothes and Shirl probably wouldn't like it but maybe he could wear more casual pants without a belt, zipper and button without his shirt tucked in, seems like it would be more comfortable but maybe hes comfortable in what he's used to......just a thought. We brought him some sugar wafers which he loved and shared with boy, he was very excited to see boy and can't believe what a handsome guy he is. He knew we looked familiar but didn't know who we were. After about 15 min. Grandma stopped by I asked him if he knew who she was and he said, I believe she is my lovely wife...I said yes, she is. He said he was happy about that but he doesn't get to see her that often (she was rumbling around his clothes talking under her breath...not listening to a word he was saying)  I told him he'd get sick of her if he saw her more so its best this way...he laughed. She was very happy he knew who she was :) He had a lot of things he was trying to tell us....Grandma got tired of listening....but I was really concentrating on what he was trying to get out....He said he had a great time on his trip today up the canyon and saw some horses....he spent 5 min. trying to tell me something he wanted and finally I was able to get it...he wants a map of where he went today.....I told him I would ask the nurses when I left exactly where he went and have Mike make him a map and bring it next week when I come...which made him so happy.  He really enjoyed getting out today and told me all about it. He also asked me if I went running today, I said yes...I did. He said he was chasing me screaming?!? I said you were....he says...yep that was me chasing you....I don't know what that was about!?!? When I said we had to go now he told me ok that he was just going to sit in his chair and scream now....I said why would you do that...well I don't know and then he laughed. 

Friday Update

Yesterday, dad slept all day long.  They couldn't get him to wake up for breakfast or lunch, but made sure he ate dinner.  Mom called after dinner, and they said he was doing well, walking around and spending time in the big room.
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Talked with Sally today.  She said dad is doing very well, and now that he has settled in, they can see he is such a gentleman.   If he is walking toward the door, he always steps back to let the ladies go through first.   He also pulls out the chairs for them.   Told her he has always been like this, even when he has gone downhill the last few months.  She said it shows, and told her he still likes to make sure mom is taken care of - helps her with her coat, etc.   She said he is a sweetheart, and they are enjoying him.   Today at 2:00, they are taking all of the residents to a ranch to look at horses.   Dad should like this, so it will be interesting to see if he remembers and brings it up.   Sally also said he is at a point where it should be fine to take him out around the grounds for walks.   Maybe in a few weeks, it would be good to take him to different locations, but not good to go home yet.   Agreed.
All in all, dad is doing well.   Will be seeing him tomorrow.

Wednesday Evening Update

Spent some time with mom and then pop last night.  

Mom was doing OK.  Kinda of feeling a little blue, but seemed to be doing better after we sat and talked about everything.   She had gone done earlier in the day, and dad was doing well.   They had a musical activity, where a guy came in and brought instruments for the everyone - maracas, tamborines, etc.   Mom said dad really enjoyed it.   (More on his comments below).   We hung out at home for awhile, and then headed down to "Dad's Pad".

Mom had to go get him a few more pairs of pants, so I was able to spend about a 1/2 hour with him alone.   He was in the big room on one of the couches.  Seems to really like it here.   He was half asleep, a little incoherent, but was in a good mood.   I asked him if he knew who I was....he told me, "George".   Then started laughing.   We talked about his day and the music time.   He said it didn't go well, because "most of these people have no idea what they are doing".   Told him that may be, but he certainly does.   His reply, "Of course I do."   Funny.   The lady in the wheelchair was doing her usual thing - help me, please.  I'm thirsty, my fingers are swollen.  Will you push me?   I really need to get out of here.   The nurses were good - they respond to her about every 10 minutes.   Dad started laughing and I asked him what was so funny.  He said, "She does this all the time, and I just sit here and laugh."   He gets a real kick out of her.   The aides then brought around freshly baked chocolate chip cookes.   Unfortunately, I wasn't even offered one, and felt it would be rude to ask.   I've had these cookies before, and they are HEAVEN!  Of course, pop was happy to take one.   I put it in his hand and he said, "My word, this weighs 17 pounds."  Yup, it was all the chocolate chips.  I was hoping he would drop some of it, so I could sneak some, but he that didn't happen.  (I'm hoping that we will have cookies for us when we go to the support group on Saturday.)   Mom got there, and I took the pants to his room.   His room is cozy now - still need a few more things on the walls when you first come in the door.  If anyone visits, feel free to throw out some ideas.    He did say he likes having his TV in his room.  Guess he was watching it yesterday when mom when down earlier.  I did tell him that that when it warms up , we will get him outside to take a walk.  He said, "I don't know if I remember how to walk."   Then laughed.   Got up to go, and kissed his head.  He smiled and said he would keep me around because of that.  I kissed him again, told him I loved him, and headed for the door.   Yup, got a little teary.   He is doing so well, and I really love this, but it is tough to leave him sitting there, and I am just a kid, not the spouse.  We did the right thing, and he is settled in, comfortable, and safe. Not ot mention the fact that he has put on a few pounds and is looking good.   He did tell mom yesterday that he liked the place.    Feel good about this!

Pop Update, Wednesday, March 13

Have talked to mom a few times the last few days.  Dad continues to do well, and has been up early the past 2 mornings.   Mom buzzed down yesterday morning, and dad was asleep on the couch in the big room.   He didn't wake up, so she just sat by him a bit and then left.    She went back down right after dinner last night, and he was just going to his spot on the couch after dinner.  Doing well, was in a good mood, pretty sleepy, and they were going to be taking him to a musical performance in the main part about 7.   He told her he liked it there, really likes all the "stuff" they have going on.   Didn't mention a thing about when he would leave.   When she called down there this morning, he was up, showered, and had already eaten.  In his favorite spot on the couch.   Dean stopped in yesterday, and sat with him, too.  Said he was really sleepy, but he did talk quite a bit.  Dean didn't think he knew who he was.  

Dad seems to be settling in, which is what we all hoped and wanted.    I am going up this evening - will spend some time with mom, and then drop in on dad.   Mom and I will be going to the support group on Saturday, and if Sally thinks dad is in a good spot, we'll take him for a walk around the place.  

Monday Update, March 11

Talked to mom this afternoon.  She called at dad's place this morning, and he had a great night.  Slept well, and was up early eating breakfast.    She talked to Sally, and she said he was doing really well.  Mom went down this afternoon, and he was in a great mood.  Had just eaten a cupcake, and was on his way back to his room.  He decided he wanted to go back up and sit in the big room, so they did for awhile.   His TV was hooked up, so he and mom watched it for a little while.  They were starting dinner a little earlier tonight, cuz it's Family Home Evening, so she left and he walked to his table.   She said he was happy, didn't seem sad at all.   He did tell her that "they have a lot going on at this place".  I know they have activities every day - music therapy, games, etc.   She told him she would see him tomorrow, and he said OK.  
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It's been a week since he slugged someone.   YEAH!   I really do think he is settling in, and seems to be comfortable.   I got that impression yesterday, even though he was really sleepy.  He will likely have bad days, just like he did at home, but I feel good that he seems to be settling down and is the mild mannered pop.  

Another pic from Sunday at "Dad's Pad"

Nap time, for some.   Chuck and Shirl are snoozing, and Chad seems to have made a new friend.  Judging by the look on his face, he may not be too comfortable with it.

Sunday, March 10

Went up north today.  Fred brought in the table and tv, and we put some more stuff on the walls in dad's room.  The maintenance people will hook up the cable tomorrow.   When we got there, dad was in the big room, sleeping/watching tv with a bunch of the oldsters.   Mom and Chad sat down with him, and Fred and I went to get some stuff done in the room.   Dad eventually came back to his room and seemed to like the stuff on his walls - cars and fish.   I also put up a corkboard with some family pictures.  (See info below on this).   After Fred and Chad left, mom and I took dad down to dinner and then we took off.   He has been really out of it and sleepy yesterday and today.  Yesterday morning, they couldn't get him up so he didn't eat breakfast.   He seems to be settling in well, and hasn't slugged anyone for almost a week.   They are so good to him- take him by the hand to help him, and he lets them.   I spent some time with mom working on a puzzle.  She is doing OK, getting used to the emptiness.    I do have to say, when we left dad, we both were a little teary.  It's tough.   But, he is safe and they good to him, and the fact that he seems to be settling in helps.   I popped in to see him on my way home and took him a cookie.   He was asleep on one of the couches in the big room, but woke up when I sat down by him.   Ate the cookie, said it was good.   I asked him if he was ready to go back to sleep, and he said yes.   Kissed his head, told him I would be back, and said good-bye.  He was back out again.   He does look like he has put on a few pounds - his face doesn't look so gaunt.   When we were there earlier, Skipper was running around in her depends, no pants.   When I stopped in again, she was rearranging all the flower pots.  Pretty funny.   All in all, things seem to be calming down.  It sure is weird being at the house and not having dad there.   Then, to say "I'm going to dad's place", is even more weird.   Life throws us all kinds of things, and we now have a new normal.  P.S. - Will the following people please email me a photo of them, and families, if applicable:  Ann, Kellie, Landon Erica, Anali, need pix of Tarl/Sabrina/Ryan/Emily/Seth.  Email address:  jabugrizz@aol.com.  I stalked facebook and pulled the others, in case you are wondering why your name isn't here.  Couldn't get very good ones from facebook.

Mom and Dad in Dad's Man Cave

Friday, March 8

Another good day....happy sigh.  Dad had a good night, and mom went and visited this afternoon. She said he was in a good mood, very happy, and didn't comment when she left.   I think he is starting to get that when we say we will be back, we will.   He is definitely more comfortable, knows the room is his, and has said several times that the food is good.    Mom was doing well, just a little down, because she hates leaving him.  But, she said it is getting easier.    They have put a hold on the pills, and will watch him for any other problems.   Mom asked dad today if he is being nice.  He smiled, and said yes.   He knows what we mean we bring that up.   Fred and I will move the rest of the stuff in on Sunday, and hang up some cool stuff on the walls.   Looking forward to seeing his head in the window of his room, sitting in the sun. 

Thursday Update, March 7th

Well, dad's had another good day.   Slept well last night, didn't get up until about 9:00 this morning, and then mom spent some time with him this afternoon.   He was in a good mood, but was really tired.  He did tell her he wishes he could die soon.  Just out of the blue.  She told him we don't have a choice about that, and he'll die when it's his time.  He then said, "OK".  He was getting ready to eat when she left, and didn't seem sad.   I think he realizes now that when she will be back.   Hasn't had any Rocky moves for a few days, so we are happy for that.   We've stopped the special pills too, and he hasn't had any accidents today.   Told mom he seems to be settling in, but to remember that he will have bad days - just like he did at home.   It's kind of nice to have things just a little bit calmer, though.
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Mom loved going to Max and Zane's school today.   She hasn't been able to get out and do stuff like that for along time, and she enjoyed it.   Thanks, Smith's!
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Going to move in a small table and the TV for dad on Sunday.   I also have a few more things to put on the walls, so he will have his own man cave.  

Wednesday night visit with parents

Stopped by both mom's pad and dad's pad tonight. That is so wierd to say that. Anyway, I stopped by moms first. She was doing good. Said she is lonely at night, and that she really misses dad. I told her that we all feel that way, and maybe we're all feeling a little guilty too. I told her it was ok to miss "Dad", "Charlie", but not the other stuff that came along with the disease that she was dealing with on a daily basis. She agreed. She said that Gaylord had called her tonight as well and said he was thinking about them and praying for them, Thanks Uncle Gaylord! I love our family! She was in good spirits and looking forward to going to Max and Zane's Grandparent Day tomorrow. It's good she is able to do this stuff now. I think she will really enjoy it. Thanks Erica! Again, love our family!

When I got to Dad's place, he was having some bowel issues, like he had had earlier in the day. I got the nurse and she cleaned him up and put him in his PJ's. He told her that she had a dirty job. She said, "Yeah, for you and me". She was really good with him, showing a lot of patience.We took a walk after he was all cleaned up. I asked him if he knew who I was, and he said "Yeah, you're George". Everyone is George to dad. It's pretty funny I think. I think we can blame this on George Hansen. He must have made a huge impression on Dad. I took one of the model airplanes that was hanging in dad's office and put it in his shadow box, a P-38. I showed it to him and he really liked it. He couldn't remember what kind of plane it was, but he stared at it for awhile. He was in good spirits, saying he liked what was going on there, but didn't know how long he was going to be there. I told him not to worry about that. He said ok. As we were coming back to his room I saw another resident going into dad's room. When I opened the door, Miss Naolia Roskelly was there. I said hi, how are you? She said fine, that she was running some errands. I noticed that she had some of Dad's M & M's that we got for him that are in the bowl on his dresser. Pretty funny. The word is out that Charlie has treats! The nurses probably like them too!I showed her where her room was. She was nice. Very funny though. She's the bearded one, kinda nasty at times. Thats what she told me the other night. Don't turn your back on her.

Overall it was a really good night. Both parents are doing fine. I talked with the nurses, as has mom, to stop giving dad his poop pills. He obviously doesn't need them.

Quick Wednesday Afternoon Update

Talked to mom.  She spent almost 2 hours with dad this afternoon, because he was having such a good day.  No slugging, has been in a good mood.   They had a guy in that played the banjo and sang western songs, and they both enjoyed that.   He wasn't sad or upset when she left, and that is good.  Still very hard to leave him, which is understandable - she cried on the way home, and hope this will get easier.   She is hanging out at home tonight, a little down, but doing OK.   Looking forward to going to g parents day tomorrow with Max and Zane. 

Update on Tuesday Evening

Mom and I went to dinner last night.  She is doing OK, but is really lonely.  She knows this is something she has to deal with, but she honestly seemed a little down.  As we ate and talked, she perked up somewhat.    We talked about how we need to help more in getting adjusted to his new home.    First - Remember that he will have bad days there, just like he did at home.   It's the disease.  Second - Keep the visits shorter until he gets settled in.    Don't bring up home, or even refer to home.  Third - Don't visit him at mealtimes.    He is on pretty much on a routine schedule with meals, and needs to get used to us not being there when he eats.  This will allow him to be more on his own, because when someone is with him, he tends to get "helped" a lot.   And, this will also help him be more social with his fellow Alz folks.   Last, but certainly not least - If dad is asleep when anyone arrives, don't wake him.    You can tell when he is in a deep sleep, and just dozing.  If he is in a deep sleep, sit for a bit and see if he wakes up, but it doesn't turn out well when he is awakened.  He is disoriented and tends to be very angry.  Mom agrees.  Everyone is learning about how to deal with all of this, and it isn't easy.  We went to the store, and picked up a few things for her.  Talked her into trying a few Lean Cuisine and Healthy Choice meals, then add some cottage cheese and veggies to it.  I also stressed to her that even though it is just her, she needs to eat well and take care of herself, especially during all of this.  She said she understood.  I also stressed that it is going to take some time for dad, and everyone to adjust.   Nothing is going to be great overnight.  

When I left mom, she was in a much better mood.  Stopped at dad's, and he was dozing in the chair at the end of the hall.    His eyes were half shut, so I knew he wasn't fully under.   I sat down, touched his arm, and told him I was here to see him and he couldn't even wake up.  With his eyes still closed, he said, "Who's there?"   Told him my name and that I was his daughter, and he just smiled.   I asked him if he was really sleepy, and he said yes.  Told him I brought him some cookies, and I would just leave them in his room and see him another time.  I took a few steps, and he said, "Where ya goin?  Thought I was gonna get a cookie?"   Gave him one and he started to perk up.   We sat there and talked - told him I was glad he hadn't slugged anyone for a day or two.   He smiled. Also told him that he doesn't need to slug people - everyone is there to help him, and he is not in danger.    He said OK.   He was ready to go into his room, but couldn't remember where it was.  (He is about 3 feet away from the door.)  Helped him into his room, and when I showed him his nametag, he said, "Well, how about that?".  Settled him in the chair and tucked his blanket around him.   Asked him if he stood at his window today and looked out - said yes.   "There was a big plane that just about hit the building.   He was about 4 feet off the ground."   Asked if he was scared, and he said no, he thought it was pretty neat.    Told him when it warms up in a few weeks, we will get him outside and take some walks, and he said that sounded good. We are moving in the TV and a small table this week, and he said the TV would be good.   We can leave it on the western or military channel, and he may just watch it more.    He was pretty sleepy, so told I him I was leaving, but would be back.  Gave him a kiss and told him I loved him, and he said "Thanks, sweetheart."   Gotta say - as good a day as he had, it is damn tough to leave him.   I can see how mom feels, somewhat, when she leaves.  He didn't mention going home or anything like that, so I can imagine how difficult it is for her.  Yup, I cried for a little bit on the way home.  When I left, I talked to some of the aides.  Met one of the aides that was on the reciprocating end of the slugging when dad thought they were taking his stuff.  She is a little itty, bitty thing.   Said he has quite the swing - told them he always has, boxed in high school and has always been strong.   They said his behavior is normal and sometimes takes a month or two to adjust.  I left feeling good, but sad.

Talked to mom this morning.  She called dad's place about 8:30 last night, and he was in bed.  Figured he would be in bed early.   She had a good night, and seemed to be in a pretty good mood.  going to lunch with her friends today, then going to see dad.   She is also excited about going to grandparent day with Zane and Max tomorrow morning.

To everyone - Call here and stay in touch .  She likes to hear from people, even if it's just a brief phone call.  Tell her about what you've been doing, ask about her day.   She needs contact and it will help her immensely.   Haven't heard yet how dad's night was.
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Update, 9:15 a.m.
Dad had a good night.  Didn't want to get dressed this a.m., so ate in his jammies.  Not the first time someone has done that.   In a good mood, wanted to go back to his room and sit in the sun.  No Rocky moves, thus far.  Keep your fingers crossed.

Chuck Update, Tuesday, March 5

So, dad had a good night last night.   No Rocky moves, and he was up at 6:00 today.  In a great mood
Mom went to see him briefly this morning, and he was so happy to see her.   Kissed her on the forehead and told her he was glad to see her.  He also asked her when he was going home.   This breaks her heart, but she did tell him he needed to stay there awhile longer.  She said he was happy, didn't balk when she told him she needed to leave.   They were starting to set lunch out.   I will stop by for a bit this evening, and take him a treat.   We will see how he is then.
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Yesterday, was a combo of everything.  I believe dad was a little overwhelmed by all that went on over the weekend.   I also found out this morning, that when mom got there yesterday afternoon, she woke him up.  This is not a good thing - never turns out well.  He is cranky and disoriented when this happens.  On top of just the disease, it was not a good day for him.  After he ate dinner last night, though, he had a good night.

I intend on keeping my visit brief with him tonight.  Mom was really emotional after she left him today, feels badly that he keeps asking her when he is going home.  Told her the good news, is that he was happy today.  This may change in a heartbeat, but we do need to look at the positive.   I will go visit dad, then Shirl and I are going out for a salad.  Will blog later tonight or in the morning.

Monday Afternoon

Just got a call from mom.  She is at Chancellor, and dad won't have anything to do with her, or anyone else.  Won't talk, sitting on his bed.   Pointed at the door for mom to leave.  She is sitting out in the hall in the chair.   Guess this morning, when he slugged the nurse, it was in her stomach.  Ugh. 
Mom said he has never acted like this before - both Eric and I reminded her he was like this the morning she called Eric over.   It's not necessarily that he is there, it's the disease.  Although, I am sure he is agitated.  He's had a lot of visitors over the weekend, and maybe it was too soon.  The best thing to do is let him be alone.   Something to keep in mind:  We've seen him purposefully act out to get his way, like a child.    He may be doing this thinking he will get to leave.   Or, he is just expressing his frustration the only way he can.  Either way, it's frustrating, but there is nothing we can do.  Mom will keep in touch.

Monday, 3/04

Last night, guess dad was a little agitated, but he calmed down and went to bed about 8:30.   Hard to know what he was agitated about.

This morning, mom called down there and they had gone down to his room to get him moving, and he started swinging.   Left him alone, and will try again.    Ugh.
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Mom called.  She called again, and dad had gotten dressed and eaten.  Doing fine.  

Today The Smiths went to visit Grandpa Chuck. When we arrived the nurse told me that he was doing great today besides putting his pajama pants on over his slacks. He was just finishing up his lunch (he ate everything except his roll) and was pretty happy to see us.  As soon as he saw us he smiled and said "Well, hi!"  I asked him if he knew who I was, he smiled and laughed and said you look very familiar to me. He seemed excited to see the boys and asked if I had 17 kids. Nope just the two. These two ladies were absolutely in love with the boys and followed them everywhere, asking their names several times, touching their shoulders and just oohing and aawing over them...pretty funny. Several women stopped to tell me what a sweetheart Grandpa was, one stopped to tell me they had dinner together today, didn't they?, one asked me a few times if I was his daughter?  and one woman asked me if he was from fort, ford? Um no....pretty funny. One woman, that walks the halls and tried to trip Mike last week followed us everywhere and kept looking at us sticking her tongue out and smiling, she kind of freaked the boys out but was harmless. We told Grandpa to show us around, we stumbled upon the Organ and he said he'd never seen nor played one before. Really? Hmmm lets see about that. Z sat down and played while Grandpa just smiled and said "this boy can play really good for his age!" He was smiling and enjoying the music, when Z finished I had Grandpa sit down and told him to give it a try. He played a song pretty dang good. I said, it looks like you do know how to play! He laughed and said he knows how to make a lot of noise! After he took us to his room, showed us around and told us this was a really nice place. He told me he set this up and he'd been living here 3 days all on his own now. He then told us he has a free market he wanted to show us but you have to be careful because if you go in to far you will get in trouble (the kitchen). We went out in the hall again, tinkering around with the tools and then he seemed to get really lost and disoriented....didn't know where his room was, thought if he went to the room across the hall it would take him upstairs and told me that a lot of work needed to be done. We took him back to his room and he said he never gets tired of visitors but that he was tired and wanted to sit down. He asked if we lived close by, I said yes, we will come visit often and he should go lay down. Ok good idea...which is what he did. He seemed pretty happy and the most lively I have seen him in a long time.  

Weekend Info

Mom seemed to enjoy getting out Friday night.  She sat by Lillian, and I think it was good for her.  After the play, I went home with her and spent the night.    It was really weird getting home, and dad wasn't there.   Saturday morning, mom and I went and had breakfast, then visited dad.  We got there about 9:15, and he was just getting up.   The nurse said she had tried to get him going a few times earlier, but he was so tired, so she let him sleep.  They try to get them into a routine, but once in awhile, she said they deserve to sleep in, just like anyone else.   I took some laundry back to the house and waited for Fred and Eric, and mom got dad dressed, took him to the kitchen area to eat a muffing and some milk.   Fred and Eric moved dad's sofa and dresser in, and we all visited with dad a bit.  When we got there, dad had shoes on that didn't belong to him, and the nurse had found dad's shoes in someone else's room.   The shoes dad had on with Scott's, who lives across the hall.  Not sure how they all got mixed up.  My guess, is that there is a lot of wandering around, and the residents just take what looks good to them.   I am sure it won't be the last time this happens.

Since dad hadn't had much breakfast, he was hungry when they started serving lunch at 11:00.  Chad took him down to eat, so the rest of us could move dad's clothes around, and things settled.   It was cute to see Chad holding grandpa's hand as they walked down the hall to lunch.   Mom went down a little bit later, and Fred said dad grabbed her hand when she sat down at the table with him.  Guess before that, dad asked where his Shirley Mae was.  Cute.   Fred and Chad left, and I asked dad if he knew who those 2 guys were.   He thought really hard, and said, "relatives".  Then kinda smiled.  Told him who they were....you could tell the gears were turning.   We walked back down the hall, and mom and Eric were just coming down.   Dad looked at mom and said, "she looks good," or something like that.   Eric said his good-byes, and the 3 of us went to dad's room.  He was happy to see his sofa.  Said, "well, look at that."   He was cold, so I helped him put on his sweater.   As I was reaching around him, I asked him if was going to slug me.  He said, "nope."   I asked him if he had hit anyone else, and he said, "nope, I've been a good boy."  Told him good, that to remember everyone is here to help him.  Then he said, "I've been a good girl, too."   Then he smiled.   Just then, Eric drove up to his window.  Dad's room faces south, and the driveway is right out his window.  We had opened his blinds to get some sunshine, and Eric stopped and waved.  Dad thought this was pretty cool.   He was tired, wanted to sit on his sofa and sleep.  He sat right on the end, in the sun, and we tucked his blanket around him, and took off.  We went back a little later, and was just starting wake up some.   I labeled the drawers on his dresser, and showed him where his clothes were.   Deb and Eric had left a bowl of M&M's, and dad thought that was pretty cool, munched on a few.   Told him we would get his tv hooked up this week.  Mom sat there with him, and the two of them held hands.   I took off, and mom stayed.    Dad had a few visitors - Larry Poulson, his friend from the days of HAFB.  Larry told mom later that dad was mostly asleep, but he stayed about 20 minutes and just talked to him.   Dad didn't remember anything about that visit.   Guess Dean and Virgie stopped by, too.    After they left, mom said she would be leaving, but would return.  Dad slipped into the bathroom and when he came out, mom said he was wet.  Had obviously not made it very quickly.  Mom said she was gentle, and suggested they get him changed, and he yelled at her, slapped his hands together, and then sat down in the recliner with his arms folded.   What we are learning, is that it's best to leave him alone when he gets this way, so mom told him she loved him, and she would be back soon.   She did call about an hour later, and he had calmed down, and was eating dinner around 5:00.  However, guess when the nurse was helping him get cleaned up, he took a swing at her.  She saw it coming, and ducked.   So much for not slugging anyone else, huh?!  At least he hadn't taken a swing at anyone since Wednesday morning!  Guess the evening went well, and he was in bed fairly early.  When mom called this morning shortly before 8, dad was dressed and eating breakfast, and had a good night.

What I noticed about yesterday, is that dad seems to be getting more settled.  When Eric and I were walking with him, he did motion and said, "this place is good."  Eric asked him if he meant his room and the food so close, and dad said yes.  Also, he told mom that "you did the right thing".  When she asked what he meant by that he told her, "putting me here."  It's clear that dad has been thinking, and is aware of, at least some of the time, of what is going on.   That was encouraging.  But, we also know he may forget some of these things, and will likely have more outbursts and get agitated very easily.   I also thought it was good that he knew who mom was, and seemed very happy to see her.  

Friday Morning

Talked to mom.  She didn't have as good a night last night, but was doing well.   Just getting adjusted to being alone.   She is in good spirits, and getting ready to go down and spend some time with dad.   She did call the place shortly before 8:00, and dad was still asleep - had a good night.  
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Reminded her that he will have good and bad days there, just like he had at home.   She said yes, she needs to remember this.  We all need to remember this.
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After Mom's visit:
He was doing well, mom spent a couple of hours with him.  Was sitting in the big chair in the main room, got up when she came in.   He recognizes her, but doesn't know she is his wife.  He had eaten breakfast, even though he told her he hadn't.  They went to his room, and he just wanted to stand.   Talked about what he'd been doing, and he told her was going to go hunting.   She told him there was nothing to hunt this time of year, but he will be able to go outside when the weather gets better.   Then  he said, "Well, guess I'll be taking off."   She asked him where she was going, and he told her here and there.   Walked back down to the main room with him and said her good-byes.  She was careful not to say "home", just told him she was leaving and would be back, and that others will be in to see him.   He said OK, wasn't agitated, very pleasant.  Mom is excited about getting out tonight and going to Bry's play.  We'll call to see how dad is doing this evening, and then I'll come back up and spend the night.   Eric will be home today, and he and Fred will move in the rest of dad's stuff, so we can get his room all "his".