Chuck's Move

It has been crazy the last 4 days, so I will give a summary.  

We moved furniture and clothes in on Saturday and Sunday.   Met pop's roommate, Rick.  He was doing well, and when I talked to his wife Sunday morning, she said he had taken a turn for the worse.   Trent and I went back Sunday afternoon, and Rick looked horrible.  By Sunday evening, all of his family had gathered, so we couldn't take in any more belongings.  The nurse said Rick wasn't expected to make it through the night.   Trent and went to Chancellor on Monday morning, and Rick did pass away.   Dad's move was still on, though.  It was weird to be moving things in and then suddenly, Rick was gone.  

Trent, Ann, and I took the folks to the place on Monday morning.  Showed dad his room, and told him the doctor wanted him to stay for a few days to see how he does.   Dad was confused and very disoriented, and glared at all of his.   He knew what was going on.   We tired to get him to go have lunch, but he slapped his hands together and raised his voice, "That's not going to work."  Mom, Ann, and I decided it was time to leave, and Trent hung out with pop.  They brought a lunch tray down and he wouldn't eat anything, not even ice cream.  He fell asleep and Trent left, but he came back later.  Dad was awake and rested.   Told Trent, "I didn't know we were gonna do this today."  Trent explained to him that he needed to be in place that could help him more, and mom wasn't able to do it any longer, and this was the way he had things set up.  Dad just nodded.   Guess he ate a good dinner last night, and wandered around the place a little.   I stopped in about 7:30, and he was getting ready for bed.   He didn't recognize me, couldn't believe it when I told him he had 2 daughters and 3 sons.  Said, "Wow, I was active, wasn't I?"   He was very formal with me, very pleasant.  Thanked me for stopping by.   He really wanted to go to bed, so I left.  

Mom called the place shortly after 8 this morning, to see how dad was doing.  He had a good night, but when the nurse was helping him get dressed this morning, he popped her arm a few times.   She just left him, to diffuse the situation.   When Trent and I got there,  he was in his room, fully dressed.   Same clothes as yesterday, but at least he had finished dressing himself.  He knew who we were.  Said some guy tried to jump him and take his money, but he clomped on him a few times, and "that was the end of that."  We walked down to breakfast, and he inhaled pancakes, sausage, bananas, and juice.   He kept saying how people were trying to take his money, and he needed to hit them.   We explained to him that everyone there is his friend and trying to help him.   Told him that he actually hit Melinda, and she was trying to help him get dressed.   You could see the wheels turning, and things were sinking in that he had hit the nurse, not a guy.   Told him his other daughter, Ann,and his wife, Shirley, would be visiting him in the afternoon.  He asked how many wives he had.  Trent told him 6, just like all good palligamists did, and he laughed. He then asked what color they were, and Trent told him white.  After breakfast, we walked around the halls and took him to all the activity stations.  They have one for fishing, tools, and airplanes.  It was clear this was very stimulating to dad, because he started remembering things from 40 years ago.   He also sat down and played the organ, and plunked around on the piano.    We took him down to the end of the hall, by his room, and showed him how he could look at the window and watch the trucks on the freeway.  He then started to remember about the trucks delivering stuff to the store.  Amazing!   He was tired, so we moved his chair in the room to face the window and he fell asleep.   By the way, he did say during our activity time, that he hoped he hadn't hurt "that girl" too much.   He understood what had happened, and had been thinking about it.

At 2:00 today, there was a musical performance, so Ann and mom went down.  Ann sent pics, and it looks like pop was really enjoying himself.   He also sat down at the organ again, and was even using the foot pedals.   Ann will try and slip down later tonight.  Both Ann and Trent go home tomorrow, and I am now home.

Mom seems to be relieved and guilty, all at once.  I can tell you, when we left him there on Monday, it was tough, but there was a huge sense of relief.   Mom did perk up yesterday, she has enjoyed just being home and not having to be "on" so much.   I do think she will struggle with this new normal, especially when everyone leaves tomorrow.   I think she was almost a little nervous about going to visit dad.  Not sure if she was just thinking he wasn't going to do well, or nervous that he wouldn't remember her.   Ann did say pop did remember mom, may have remembered her, but wasn't sure.

I think dad will be fine, once he gets adjusted.   It will be good to get the rest of Rick's stuff out of the room, and we can move more of his own stuff in.  His favorite sofa and a tv.   He will get the stimulation and care that he needs there, and you an tell that the staff cares about the patients.  They want to be there, it's not just a job.

The last few days have been very emotional, but good.  Each time I  have left dad these past few days, I have cried.   It's just so weird to have him someplace other than sitting in the sofa on the window.   When he is the nice Charlie, he is such a sweet little old man.   You just never know if you are going to get the sweet Charlie, or the paranoid Charlie.